The Grand Tour

The Grand Tour’s Worst Car Modifications From Clarkson, Hammond, and May

The Grand Tour has seen its fair share of strange and wacky modifications from hosts Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, and James May. It’s part of what makes the Amazon Prime car show so lovable, and yet, none of them really work.

From the M.I.L.F (Motorway Inter Lane Fuelling) truck to The Excellent, we thought we’d bring you every bad modification the boys have carried out from the first five seasons.

Jeremy Clarkson’s Nautical RV – International Buffoons Vacation

During a special episode of The Grand Tour, Clarkson, Hammond, and May are forced to go travelling across the United States. So, to this, they each buy an RV and modify it to suit their tastes. Clarkson modifies his with a nautical theme, adding a two-tone paint job with the driving controls all on the roof such as the steering wheel and the accelerator.

Within the RV, the whole interior was turned into a bathroom. Yep, a bathroom. But pull a lever, and you’re treated to the gorgeous views of the US.

Unfortunately, moving the control was a bit of an issue, with Clarkson suddenly losing all control over its gears and brakes, meaning Hammond and May had to force the RV to a stop using their own. This was a brilliant episode, but the modifications weren’t so good.

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Richard Hammond and James May’s Motorway Inter Lane Fuelling (MILF) Truck – It’s A Gas, Gas, Gas

Richard Hammond and James May realise that refuelling their cars costs the average motorist 36 days of their life. So, using their genius and skill, the pair come up with multiple ways of cutting down the time it takes to fuel a car.

The best, and worst I suppose, was the MILF. A van that allowed the refuelling of a car while on the motorway and on the move. Unfortunately, it didn’t work out quite so well for Hammond who was driving the car being fuelled. The fuelling system broke, spilling fuel everywhere, and Hammond’s car eventually set on fire and blew up.

In fact, all of their inventions, bar the last, ended in an explosion.

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James May’s Lada Firetruck – Unscripted

In an episode of The Grand Tour where Clarkson, Hammond, and May went about creating an episode completely unscripted, James turned up out of the blue with a Lada that he’d turned into a fire truck. This didn’t quite fit alongside Hammond’s Ariel Nomad or Clarkson’s Audi TTRS, so he left the duo to go on his own fire-fighting adventure.

Attaching an icecream van ‘siren’ to the car, a bucket of sand, and a poor excuse for a hosepipe, he didn’t get very far before realising he’d done a bad job.

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James May’s 1984 Mercedes Wagon Fish Tank – Feed The World

In a bid to deliver fresh fish to a starving village in central Mozambique, James converted his Mercedes into a fishtank to allow for easy transportation. Unfortunately, there was one serious issue that made driving this estate very difficult.

Whenever May braked, a wave of water would splash into the front of the car, soaking him to the skin. Also, thanks to the added weight of the water, it was now 0.7 tonnes heavier than the standard car, meaning it was incredibly slow (like its driver), and easily stuck. This was obviously incredible funny for Clarkson and Hammond who were in stitches watching May attempt driving.

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James May’s Mud Car – Enviro-mental

This episode’s focus was on sustainability, specifically, sustainable cars. So, with this in mind, the hosts build three cars made of sustainable materials. May builds his out of mud, Clarkson builds his out of animal carcasses, and Hammond builds his out of wood and plants.

Well, it turns out that mud is very heavy and not overly strong. So when May starts driving across the English landscape, not only is he very slow weighing 5 tonnes, but it starts falling to pieces straight away. You could call it natural weight reduction?

He later swaps out the mud for bricks, which also turns out to be a stupid idea.

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Jeremy Clarkson’s The Excellent – Berks To The Future

By mixing the underbelly of a Land Rover Discovery and a Mercedes SL, Clarkson set out to build a real “luxury SUV”. Before the SL however, he topped the Disco with the body of a 1978 MGB with the engine of a 3.9-litre V8. It was named the MGD, but unfortunately lacked anything of substance in the cockpit such as a speedometer. Plus, the body kept falling off… which is rather important.

So, the SL was eventually attached, and it was actually a pretty good attempt at a sports SUV. Unfortunately, it was put up for auction at the Coys of Kensington car auction where it sold for £4,000, only £96,000 under its reserve.

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Richard Hammond’s Ford Focus RS – A Massive Hunt

The Grand Tour hosts chose three cars to drive and review in the latest episode of the Amazon show without knowing what was in store for them. Clarkson chose the Bentley Continental GT V8, May a Caterham 310R, and Hammond chose a Ford Focus RS.

When they formed a plan to travel to Madagascar to find hidden pirate treasure, they modified their cars to deal with what May describes as “the worst roads in the world”. Hammond chose to modify his cars with caterpillar tracks, and while this seems like a great idea, in the real world it was an accident waiting to happen.

The tracks didn’t survive, and in fact, the Focus was the first Grand Tour car to not finish a challenge.

Next: Worst Injuries Suffered During Top Gear And The Grand Tour

Next: Every Single “Some Say…” Stig Description From Top Gear

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