We start in the tent where Clarkson, Hammond and May discuss what’s to come in the episode. It’s a quick introduction which soon moves to Richard Hammond’s piece on the new Aston Martin, the Vantage.

Hammond Reviews The Vantage

We go to the Eboladrome, where Hammond is very complimentary of how the Vantage looks. He also likes the interior, which doesn’t have the usual mistakes of previous Astons. The engine is also brilliant. It’s from AMG, but still works well in the Vantage especially with Aston’s tune on it.

I think it’s safe to say he loves it, despite a few small issues such as visibility, the indicator sound, and there being too much Alcantara. He even admits that it is close to, if not better, than a Porsche 911.

On the Eboladrome by the hands of Abbie Eaton, it gets a time of 1:20.4. That’s exactly the same as a Porsche 911 GT3RS and a BMW M5.

Conversation Street

First up is the VW ID R, and how it can corner so fast the driver could blackout due to the lateral G forces. Then, after some joking about fighter pilots, they discuss the Rolls Royce Cullinan and how Rolls didn’t want to give them one due to their fear that they’d call it ‘ugly’.

They’re interrupted by a phone going off, and it turns out to be an alarm for an audience member to pick up their children. They briefly poke fun at her before resuming their chat about the Cullinan.

Next, flying cars. They go through a few examples, but conclude that they’re useless. As are the statistics from Scotland regarding safe driving.

James On The Moon

James May has a segment on the 50th anniversary of the moon landing, He takes us through the story of spaceflight, but as this is a car show, he eventually gets to the cars the astronauts would drive. This, in particular, would be the Chevrolet Corvette. James actually drives Neil Armstrong’s Corvette in a spine tingling video.

Clarkson Tests The Citroen C3 Aircross

Clarkson decides to do a thorough test on the everyday Citroen. the first test is ‘can the car go faster than itself?’. A top speed test is done at Milbrook where it gets 115mph. But Clarkson thinks it can do better. He uses the slipstream of a Bentley Bentayga where it eventually does 123mph.

Next, parking. Clarkson concludes that if the car is bigger than the space, then no it can’t park there. But if the space is bigger than the car, then yes it can.

Now, a strength test. Can it pull a 13,000 tonne ship? The car is hooked up to a car transporter, and it needs to drag the ship 25 metres. It actually manages to do it… kind of, so with that sorted out, Clarkson can now look at practicality.

Turns out there’s not a lot of space for kids, even those bought by Angolina Jolie. The boot is just about big enough for a very small horse, though.

For the next test, they’re in France to see if it could work as a police car. A DeTomaso Pantera is being used for an armed robbery, so Clarkson is on the case in the Citroen! After a hilarious chase, the Pantera eventually broke down and was caught by Clarkson.

The final test covers the invasion of Italy. So, Clarkson uses the Citroen to cross the Alps and it turns out that the little car is pretty good off-road.

At the tent, Hammond and May think the tests were awful. They exclaim that the tests were useless, and that there should have been at least a comparison to the Vauxhall equivalent. James offers a better test. How easy is it to vacuum the Vauxhall? Clarkson says he knew he’d bring that up, so gives it to Sir James Dyson (yes, actually) who says it’s very easy!

See Full Season 3 Guide